"Nobody notices the bridge that doesn't fall down."
My dad, in all his infinite wisdom, said that the other day. It stems from a conversation he had with another person regarding choosing to see the good in life. As humans, we're pretty notorious for only noticing the bad and the ugly. Just looking at the daily news proves that. Big earthquakes mean big death tolls. Crazy moms that (allegedly) murder their children. Cruise ships that run aground and the people that die. Snowstorms that cause insane traffic pile-ups. I mean, look at how long coverage of 9/11 lasted (and, honestly, continues to last). We fixate on things that are just horrible.
Really, when was the last time you heard AND REMEMBERED a happy news story? I have no idea. Sure, part of that stems from the fact that I don't have television right now, but I've always been a chronic news-watcher/reader and I honestly can't remember the last happy story I heard.
Because of this (and a million other reasons), it has to be a conscious choice, a concerted effort, to see the good in life. There are crappy things that happen all the time, we can't get around that. But what's stopping me from ignoring the bad and fixating, instead, on the good. My pastor said it best, I think: "There are no bad endings." It makes me think of the SEVERAL crummy days I had last week. I can continue to think about how bad those days were, dwelling on things I can't change, or I can remember that because of those bad days, I treated myself to a cupcake! And let's be honest...cupcakes are a pretty good ending (at least, for me)!
Of course, there are much bigger, much harder things to wade through. Much more distressing than anything that happens at work. My personal life is in a bit of upheaval right now...kind of the most upheaval I've ever experienced. It's a crappy ending right now. It's nearly impossible to see the good in it. I have a friend that is experiencing similar personal turmoil and I don't know how or if she's able to see the happy ending in it. But what I believe for myself and for her is that somewhere, somehow, there can be a pretty thick silver lining. It might not happen tomorrow. It might not happen for YEARS. But I'm choosing to believe (for both of us) that it can and will come around.
And in the meantime, I'll celebrate my cupcakes!
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Something i've learned over the years is that happiness is a choice. For the most part, we can't control the bad or the good things that come our way, but we can decide how we react to things and what we're gonna focus on.
ReplyDeleteI've seen people with seemingly happy lives, but they're just miserable because they choose to look at every little thing that isn't perfect. I've also seen people in exceedingly difficult situations who manage to keep a grasp on what is good in this life.
Life isn't perfect. Never will be. But, if we choose to look at missed oportunities, cloudy days and crumbled bridges instead of new adventures, silver linings and cupcakes, then we're gonna be miserable.
I couldn't possibly agree with you more. I'm okay with wallowing in the sadness for a time, but...turn, turn, turn, right?
ReplyDelete"Happiness is a choice."
ReplyDeleteTotally stole my line.
In general, outlook on life is very strong. Fun tip... smiling can improve your mood. For psychological/physiological reasons, even if you're not feeling like it... smiling will MAKE you happier. (I could go into more detail, but won't right now. Short version, your mood center of your brain actually responds to mood actions like this.)
I am usually in a pretty good mood... one of the only things that really gets to me pretty bad is when someone close to me is down and I can't cheer them up.
So smile, Micah. It helps. :)