Wednesday, April 2, 2008

It's a freaking miracle!

first of all, holy crrrap. people from all over europe are reading my blog! this is fantastic! if only one could make a living blogging...that would be rather much the awesome. someone from greece read this morning, so that's fun. well, morning in denver anyway.

todd and i are getting two dogs next week! they are so crazy and weird, i can hardly stand it...i love them! i have started calling them "punkins" which is apparently my word for every single dog i see now...i tend to think any dog is cute at this point. this is a major step forward for me, if you know my history with dogs. if you don't, i'll enlighten you.

when i was about 13 years old, i was walking from my house to my school for cheerleading practice (yes, we practice. yes, it's a sport. shut it). it's going to sound like i lived in the boondocks growing up, but i assure you, i lived in a rather large city (which made for fun times in college, but i digress). there was a canal behind my house that i'd walk along to make my way to the main street and then on to my school...it was about a mile, more or less. nothing i couldn't handle. took about 15mins to walk each way and made for a nice warm up before practice. anyway, at the end of the canal, there was a house. with dogs. three of them. there was a mastiff, another big dog (like a husky or something) and a tiny ankle-biting bastard. the mastiff often enjoyed getting out of his yard and making his way to MY yard to sit and stare at our chickens (yes, we raised chickens). made it real hard to get into my house, what with having to run like hell past the dog. at any rate, this particular day, all three dogs were in they're own yard and decided that it would be fun to chase after me. and so they did. remember, i'm 13 years old at this point and weigh approximately 75lbs soaking wet. the ankle-biting bastard dog did just that and began attacking my legs and feet while the other two simply barked incessantly. i'm screaming bloody murder at this point.

an important thing to note here is that about a half-mile up the street, there is a fire department. i was screaming so loudly that they actually pulled out bells, whistles and trucks and came hauling ass down to where i was. when the fire dept got to me, they were actually dumbfounded. not by the fact that i was screaming in the manner in which i was, but because the bitch that owned all three dogs was actually just standing in her yard WATCHING all of the happen, never once calling her dogs off.

it was horrible, but i made it to practice and that was that. i think i probably sat out most of it because i was probably shaking so badly i wasn't going to do anyone any good anyway. so there's that.

about 8 years later, i meet a boy named Tony. he's a friend of a friend of a...you get the idea. and he and his (then) wife owned to rottweilers. oh goody! i'm thinking. big ass dogs. great. well, i meet Tony's dog and he's a bit of a teddy bear and despite his size, he's a pretty low-key (albeit protecitve of Tony) dog. one day, during the summer, a bunch of my friends and i are having a BBQ at my girl friend's house. Tony brings his enormous dog, which none of us balk at. at one point, there are probably 4 or 5 of us in the front yard, wrestling about and tossing around a football and such. at one point, Tony grabs the football from me and i don't take kindly to this. and so i attacked him....jumped on his back, etc. etc. it was hilarious. there are pictures of it somewhere in the world. well, Tony's dog did NOT take kindly to me attacking Tony. so he attacked me. he came up from behind me and literally leveled me. it was uber-scary. the dog never bit me or anything like that, but at that point, i was weighing at about 100lbs...the dog was easily 85lbs. he was (and probably still is) a big ass dog.

suffice it to say, the fact that i'm open to getting dogs is kind of a miracle. we're starting small...Leo and Suki are teeny little ones. and they're totally nuts! especially Leo, who is "my" dog (and i'm going to get him a totally bad-ass collar, leash and harness...it'll be rad). he's kind of a complete headcase and i love it! he runs really funny and just makes me laugh a whole bunch. Suki is Todd's dog and she's much calmer than her BFF (she was absued which probably has a lot to do with ehr subdued nature...we've only heard her bark two or three times). she's just a little cuddle-butt which is fun, but we'll have to work with her on that one...she seems to think that everyone wants to cuddle, which just isn't the case.

so training these little guys is going to be rather hilarious...woot!

5 comments:

  1. Just remember that me reading your blog appears to come from New York, not Denver!

    I'm way excited about the "punkins." It's probably not a coincidence that Suki is mellow and Leo is ... tightly wound, and ow they are mine and your respectively. This is going to be fun times.

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  2. oh you are so funny! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

    well, okay, you might be right. bother.

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  3. I don't know. If I were truly completely right then Leo would be planning a wedding and Suki would need to manage her money better.

    Hahahahahahahahahahaha

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  4. or Leo would be freaking out over misplaced toys and Suki would be sitting there....

    COUGH COUGH COUGH. whew.

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  5. omg...remind me to tell you about the SCARIEST weenie dog named lizzie that used to chase me away from my friends house when i was younger......

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