Tuesday, April 15, 2008

I'm with drama -------->

Title courtesy of Heather....credit where credit is due.

I have way too much going on in my life right now. Sometimes I wish I could just do one thing at a time. School or work, that sort of thing. This is precisely why I will do everything in my power to make sure that our children finish college the way it was intended to be finished. It would kill me if my kid(s) ever had to deal with the intense headaches that have been persistent in my life for as long as I can remember.

I feel like I'm really half-assing a lot of my schoolwork right now. It's pretty pathetic of me, considering that I was put on the honor roll last semester. I've worked really hard for that and I just don't have enough energy to function anymore. The truth is that I was single the last time I was in school. Marriage changes EVERYTHING, quite literally. I had been prepared for that, but I don't think I realized how much things would change in my life. I wouldn't not want to be married, not a chance. It just didn't occur to me, ever, that the pressure of school would be doubly so once I got married.

It's not like I'm taking more credit hours than I was before. Precisely the same amount. I'm not really sure why the pressure has become greater. And maybe it hasn't. Maybe it's just changed...much like everything else.

On top of all of that, we now have dogs, which are loads of fun...but we have to get up every morning at 5:30am to take them for a walk before we can even think of beginning our day...demanding little boogers, they are! It's going to take some time for my body to adjust to this new schedule.

And it's going to snow tomorrow, which I'm none too happy with...it means that I'm going to have an even worse headache than I do already (stupid weather changes screw with me in a most serious way) and I'm going to have to walk Leo in the snow and that is going to SUCK at 5:30 in the morning. Ergh.

After an interesting conversation with a good friend yesterday, it has come to my attention that I am too busy to be a good friend. I can't help out and I have no advice to give. I'm stretched too thin and so are all of my friends. How did it become that we're all too busy for each other and at the same time that all our lives have gotten this busy, some of our lives are seemingly falling apart and we just can't BE there for each other??? How is this imaginable?

Why do I have nothing left to give when all the people around me, the people I love the most, seem to need me (and the rest of their friends...I'm nothing spectacular here) the most?

Sigh.

1 comment:

  1. ditto.
    and gggrrr.
    melted cheese sandwiches, lady.
    could be better.
    "Well, actually, my father's dying of prostate cancer. So I don't really troule him for gifts much." could be worse.

    ReplyDelete

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